(A little) guilty

Who doesn't know the feeling? It's not the really bad guilt because you hid a dead body in your backyard. It's the tiny, nagging guilt about the small things in life, when you suddenly find yourself in an impossible position, when whatever way you decide...

... it's still wrong.

Remember that old cupboard (table, curtains, bed, sofa, etc.) your parents gave you 20 years ago? It was very precious to them (and still is). At that time you were simply glad not to have to spend your money on a cupboard. After a few years and a few relocations the cupboard found its destiny in your basement. And there it is: half empty, not very attractive, a bit rusty but high quality.

One Saturday, your wife/husband/partner/mother-in-law wants to clear out the basement. Of course that old cupboard has to go. Firstly because it's ugly, secondly because he/she wants something newer, more expensive, prettier, bigger and thirdly because it's of no use anymore (I can already see how it sadly hangs its head…). 

And here it is, this exact moment when you can't escape the guilt. And worse: it's double-sided. Whatever you say it's either your wife/husband/partner/mother-in-law who makes you feel guilt-ridden because you don't want to let go of this ugly old (but still precious to your parents) cupboard (table, curtains, bed, sofa, etc.). Or your parents are very disappointed in you because you got rid of their cupboard (and really, it had quality and still looked like new and there was enough space in your basement, wasn't there?). Whatever side you take (and you have to take one) you will feel guilty.

What to do?

In the first place never take furnishings from people you know, because sooner or later you will disappoint them. The problem with this advice: at the time you don't have the money for your own furnishings you also don't have this wisdom yet.

So if you have to get rid of such a piece simply don't tell anybody. If they ever ask (and they probably never will), tell them you had water damage after a heavy thunderstorm (that's where the basement comes in handy) and there was no way to rescue the cupboard (table, curtains, bed, sofa, etc.). However, you have to be careful since water damaged curtains are not very plausible.

My advice: 1) never tell anybody when you get rid of something, 2) think of good excuses just in case, 3) invent instant forgetfulness and 4) probably the most important advice: let your wife/husband/partner/mother-in-law make the decision. It's easier to live with the guilt than with an angry mate. And stop feeling guilty in the first place. Tell yourself you worshipped the cupboard (table, curtains, bed, sofa, etc.) for a long time and before that (time) your parents appreciated it as well for an even longer time. So it probably had enough of all this worshipping anyway and was happy to finally move on to the secondhand-shop (or to the waste disposal, but don't you dare tell anybody!).